The Inner World of the Child Date Posted: Friday, 2 February
2007
In our work with troubled children and young people we
are often drawn to wonder what accounts for how they act and how
they come to think and feel the things which they do about their
previous and present experience. Sometimes their thoughts and their
behaviour can seem unpredictable. In turn or indeed at the same time
they may delight us, puzzle us, make us fearful for them and, for
ourselves. They may invoke our envy, frustrate us and anger us. At
times it can seem that the more we try to help them the more they
resist our help. If care workers are to have any chance of helping
these young people and themselves to enjoy a healthy relationship,
it may be important that they should think about what has gone on
before for the young people. This may gain them an understanding of
how the young people they look after have come to be the way that
they are. In doing this care workers will also begin to explore what
has been termed the "inner world of the child." The idea of the
inner world has its base in psychodynamic theory. It is a world of
unconscious as well as conscious feeling and thought. It has its
beginnings in the pre-language stage of early infancy and in
psychodynamic terms it is at the core of what it is to be an
individual different from others. There are a number of
psychodynamically based theories of human development which have a
specific focus on emotional development and which relate to the idea
of the inner world of the child, including among others, those of
Sigmund Freud, Melanie Klein, John Bowlby, Eric Erikson and Daniel
Stern. I hope to consider all of these in turn in other articles,
but to begin with I want to think about the inner world of the
child, through some of the developmental theories of the English
psychoanalyst, Donald Winnicott. I have started with Winnicott
because he was interested in the work of those, including
residential child care workers, who helped emotionally troubled
youngsters. This interest is evident in much of his writing and his
developmental model can be a useful one because it provides the
child care worker with a straightforward starting point from which
it is possible to compare other theoretical stances. It is my hope
that this will help the reader build up her own general
understanding of emotional development. Cultural
and social changes since Winnicott Before considering
Winnicott's views on the development of the inner world further, we
should take into account that though Winnicott thought that others,
including the father and members of the extended family have vital
emotional and practical roles in support of the mother-baby
relationship, he almost invariably refers to the principal carer as
being "the mother". The kind of supportive structure surrounding the
birth mother which Winnicott describes is still strongly in
evidence, yet society has moved on since he was formulating his
ideas about child development in the 1950s and 1960s and the nuclear
family no longer has a monopoly as the accepted mode of child
rearing. Nevertheless in order to avoid confusion in what follows in
the main I use the convention of referring to the principal
parenting figure as "the mother." It has also become
increasingly clear that western culture has no controlling hold over
what is the"right" child-rearing model or indeed the predominant
one, and we should be mindful that patterns of child rearing differ
from one culture to another. Indeed the idea that children can only
flourish in western culture's notionally typical nuclear family is a
proposal now frequently challenged from within that culture. It is
now more widely acknowledged that it has always been possible for a
father, or the mother's partner, or even more customarily, other
family members to assume the maternal role which Winnicott assigned
to the birth mother. Nonetheless, taking all this into
consideration, Winnicott's views on the rearing of children and
their emotional development remain valid, influential and a corner
stone of other subsequent child development theories, including
developments in attachment theory. What is the
inner world of the child ? Winnicott contended that the
child's inner world begins to develop in the early stages of infancy
but significantly he believed that for some young children things
have started to go wrong before the development of their inner world
(Winnicott, 1960a). I will discuss this later. Winnicott held that
what happened between mother and child during the infant's first
year was vitally important for a child's healthy emotional
development. For him the "ordinary devoted mother" or "good-enough
mother" provides an environment which "facilitates" her baby's
natural maturational development (Winnicott, 1965 pp75-6).
Winnicott's principal premise was that if the newborn baby is to
develop healthily, he needs someone, usually the mother, to provide
the primary parental care. Winnicott understood that before the
development of his inner world the baby was a jumble of instincts,
fears and sensations which the infant cannot think about and
therefore cannot differentiate. In short during the early stages of
his life the infant cannot distinguish himself from his environment
(which includes his mother) and so he is at the mercy of all the
internal and external sensations which beset him in addition to the
vacillations of pure feelings. For example, he will feel discomfort
and pleasure. He will feel warm or cold. He will feel full or
hungry. Yet at first he won't be aware of feeling cold or hungry.
Things will simply be acceptable or unacceptable. Winnicott thought
that all these experiences are often very frightening for the
newborn baby unless they are they are held by the mother.
(Winnicott,1960a). Indeed in order to help the baby deal with these
internal and external phenomena, Winnicott speaks of the mother's
function as one of "holding" the baby. He did not just mean holding
the baby physically and providing comfort and nourishment, he also
meant holding in another sense, that is having the capacity to
"hold" those feelings the infant seems to find intolerable.
Winnicott also saw the mother's role of holding as "managing" or
containing the child's emotional experience until the child
gradually learns to understand and contain his own feelings. At this
early stage the child and mother are emotionally merged and as the
mother learns to make sense of the child's experience, she can begin
to mirror this back to him so he can start to make sense of it
himself. With the help and holding of the mother, the child
progressively begins to bring together all the disconnected parts of
his experience to the extent that he can begin to hold "himself"
together. This according to Winnicott is the birth of the inner
world. The child has developed an insight that there is a "self" and
"not me" part of the world. It is at this stage - when the baby
relinquishes the omnipotence of its cry for immediate attention and
becomes increasingly able to wait because he trusts that nurture
will eventually be provided - that integration occurs and this,
whatever else subsequently happens to him in later life, with the
exception of extreme trauma, will give him a sufficient emotional
base to survive. Winnicott argued that for most children, given
there is no thwarting or distorting of this process,the development
of the inner world has usually occurred towards the end of a child's
first year. Integration and the good-enough
mother Winnicott called the process of the development of
an inner world, "ego-integration". Here the term "ego" refers to the
capacity to organise and make sense of one's own experience. As I've
noted, Winnicott was arguing that babies are not born with an inner
world - an ego - but develop one during the first year of life. He
suggested that babies are born with an in-built tendency to develop
and mature and that this tendency when matched with "good-enough
mothering" carries the baby through these confused early stages to
the point where integration has taken place. For Winnicott the
development of an integrated inner world of the child was the
wellspring of imagination and creativity throughout life
(Winnicott,1960a). Winnicott (1965b) also thought that the
development of a child's integrated inner world was dependant on the
principal parenting figures being "good-enough" because to act as
what might notionally be considered a "perfect" mother would
inevitably shelter a child unduly from the risks inherent in life
and leave him unable to develop the capacity to deal with life's
vicissitudes. To develop a healthy inner world the infant must begin
to trust that the mothering figure (though she will not always be
present, for she too has needs,) can be counted on to be
sufficiently present to ensure that healthy nurture is sustained.
[Students of Attachment Theory may wish consider this idea in
relation to Mary Ainsworth's concept of the "secure base" and her
construct of different attachment patterns in infants (Ainsworth et
al, 1978)]. Most babies do have a "good-enough mother"; do
experience "good-enough" parenting ; do have good-enough experiences
; do achieve integration and so most babies have the basis for
healthy emotional development, even though they may subsequently -
as of course, we as child care workers also did, because we too have
been infants - encounter all sorts of difficulties and develop
various anxieties as childhood and adolescence take their course.
However Winnicott felt that because most of us receive good enough
parenting and so develop a good sense of ourselves we are able to
cope and deal with these difficulties and anxieties. Nevertheless a
small but significant minority of babies have a much more difficult
time and, for a variety of reasons, may not develop sufficient
integration to make a satisfactory start to their emotional lives.
The development of an integrated inner world, that is
ego-integration, is according to Winnicott a very critical
achievement. The incompletely integrated and the
unintegrated child If the development of an integrated
inner world is not achieved at the appropriate stage, then there
will be core emotional elements which will remain unintegrated.
According to Winnicott, this inevitably means that there is a strong
likelihood emotional problems will be evident throughout childhood,
while others are being stored up for the future, for instance, at
the onset of puberty. The things which prevent the process of
ego-integration occurring are usually linked with matters which have
prevented the parents from providing good enough "holding". For
example if a mother's situation is such that she is more
pre-occupied by her own emotional needs to the extent that she
cannot notice or respond to the needs of her baby, there is little
chance of the baby feeling safely "held". He is more likely to feel
ignored, dropped and abandoned at a time when he does not have the
capacity to think what it all means, or, to comprehend what has
happened. If there is no one there to mediate and manage the baby's
chaotic experience, then the baby is left exposed to primitive
instinctual fears and anxieties such as the fear of going to pieces
or falling forever. These descriptions may seem dramatic but they
describe what appear to be terrifying experiences for the baby. To
remain in the unintegrated state without the prospect of relief may
be extremely fateful for the baby because it means he cannot achieve
any sense of predictability, or any understanding of people in his
external world and in particular of himself. The American
psychoanalyst, Eric Erikkson, whose theoretical propositions I will
consider in more depth elsewhere, describes this unintegrated state
as the failure of the infant to develop a sense of basic trust in
his world. Erikson argued that such a failure is the source of the
development of psychosis (Erikson, 1950). While Winnicott
suggested that most of us have experienced "good- enough" parenting
and are satisfactorily integrated, he did not believe that all the
children and young people living away from their birth family and
who were being looked after by residential child care workers in
children's homes were unintegrated. He concluded that many of these
had received "good-enough parenting" in early infancy, and that at
some time, or at some times, this had been withdrawn, and so their
inner and external world, which had held out so much hope for the
future had almost been divested of all this promise as a consequence
of the traumatic events such as family breakdown and its
consequences. However, as far as Winnicott is concerned it is
important to recognise that most of these children are ones who have
experienced a loss and are not children who have suffered
deprivation since birth or soon afterwards. Something which they had
been led to believe as a fundamentally good part of themselves - of
their inner world - has been taken away. Often children like this
can seem the most difficult to tolerate since they tend to express
their sense of loss in extreme ways and yet for Winnicott these were
the ones for whom most hope could be held since there was a part of
their inner world which, as a consequence of their experience of
"good-enough parenting", is inhabited with the potential to engage
with and to trust their external world. One such kind of child is
described by Barbara Dockar Drysdale - a psychotherapist influenced
by Winnicott and who during the 1960s and 1970s worked with children
and young people placed in therapeutic communities - is the
"archipelago child". This is a child who has experienced a disrupted
childhood during which there have been islands of "good-enough
caring" broken up by periods of neglect and abuse (Dockar-Drysdale,
1993). It is a task of the residential child care worker
Dockar-Drysdale argued to help a child build effective bridges
between these healthy parts. Residential child care workers
also work with unintegrated children and young people. The
unintegrated child does not have this sense of loss, because he has
not experienced good enough parenting at all. What has not been put
into a child's inner world in the first place cannot be taken away.
The inner world of the unintegrated child has not developed because
his complete lack of good enough caring has not allowed him to build
a structure, an inner world, strong enough to hold together all his
primitive feelings in a way that will allow him to survive without
the care and support of others. Barbara Dockar-Drysdale, described
the unintegrated child as "the frozen child"; one whose apparent
social adeptness masks a state of panic and rage which can erupt for
what seems no reason. Children like this are unable to show remorse
or any concern and lack warmth because they are unable to experience
or internalise healthy emotional approaches from others because
neglect and abuse have characterised their earliest engagement with
parenting figures (Dockar-Drysdale, 1993). The
relevance of the child's inner world to those who work with children
and young people Winnicott indicates that those children
and young people whose inner world can be characterised as one of
extreme anxiety and fear and who have been unable to develop and
sustain a coherent and healthy inner world will be significantly
influenced by poor and sometimes traumatic early nurturing
experiences (Winnicott, 1960). Those who are involved with trying to
help children and young people in the care system are engaged with
the fears and anxieties these youngsters are experiencing. They are
, young people who Adrian Ward (1998) suggests, may be out of touch
with the level and nature of their fearful and sometimes angry
feelings. Their inner world is barren or chaotic and they are unable
to express themselves in the way that most young people are. It is
particularly important for the care worker to engage with the inner
world of the young person if she is to be any help to him. Ward
suggests this can only be done if the care worker has insight of her
own inner world. In doing this Ward argues it is possible for the
worker to have some empathy for the child's feelings yet he also
points out that this empathy should not spill over into
over-identification with the young person (Ward, 1998). In order to
make a healthy engagement with a young person, the worker needs to
have insight of her own inner world and to acknowledge that this
brings something to her relationship with a young person. If this
can be achieved, I would argue that her relationship with a young
person becomes a real one which will allow both people in the
relationship to grow. The worker may then help a young person
achieve something for himself by being 'with' him emotionally rather
than doing something 'to' or indeed sometimes "for" him from a
position of unquestioned adult authority. Like the "good-enough"
mother of the infant the care worker absorbs the young person's
confused terrors and returns them to him in a way that he can
tolerate.
Charles Sharpe, 2004; revised June, 2010
and March, 2013 References
Ainsworth,M.,Blehar, M., Waters, E. & Wall,S.,(1978) Patterns
of Attachment : A psychological Study of the Strange Situation
Hillsdale, USA : Erlbaum> Dockar Drysdale, B.(1969)
Consultation in Child Care London : Free Association
Books, 1993 pp33-40 Erikson, E.H. (1950) Childhood and
Society London : Penguin Books, 1965 pp239-267 Ward,
A. (1998) 'The Inner World and Its Implications' in Intuition is
not Enough
: Matching Learning with Practice in Therapeutic Child Care
(Ward, A. and McMahon, L. eds.) London : Routledge pp 11-27
Winnicott, D.W. (1960) 'The Theory of Parent-Infant
Relationship' in The Maturational Processes and the Facilitating
Environment (Winnicott, 1965) London : Karnac, 2002
pp37-55 Winnicott, D.W. (1960) 'Ego Distortion in Terms of
the True and False Self' in The Maturational Processes and the
Facititating Environment (Winnicott, 1965) London : Karnac
2002 pp140-152 Wider Reading
Bowlby, J.(1969) Attachment London : Penguin Books
Freud, S.(1905) 'Three Essays on the Theory of Sexuality' in
On Sexuality and other works : The Penguin Freud Library Vol 7
London
: Penguin Books 1977, pp
88-170 Klein, M.(1921-45) Love Guilt and Reparation and
other works London : Vintage Stern,D. (1985) The
interpersonal World of the Infant New York
: Basic Books.
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:goodenoughcaring.com
and Charles Sharpe
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